Cess Piano: Love

Ways To Handle Your Heartbreak Vol. 2

This is basically a part two of Ways To Handle Your Heartbreak from my on-going survey-like post wherein I will ask people on what's their advice for those who are suffering from heartbreak and/or depression. Below is an answer that I got from an individual; I just translated it from Tagalog to English. (I will upload the rest of the list of short advices in a different post soon.)

Photo courtesy of Google; edited by yours truly.

1. Cry - let it all out. Avoid blaming other people and getting mad (for a long time). There's no harm in crying, we're humans and it's natural that we experience pain once in a while.

IIYAK MO NA LAHAT! ung isang bagsakan! buhos! HAGULGOL! para gumaang.. iwasan ang manisi.. iwasan ang magalit.. ok lamang ang lumuha.. ok lamang ang masaktan.. tao tayo e.. ganern talaga.. pero pag naiiyak mo na ang lahat.. ano ang next?

2. Acceptance - you can never change the past. Whatever the reason of your breakup, may it be "third party", "no spark at all", "your partner doesn't love you anymore", "your partner needs space", "you deserve better", "I need to find myself" etc. — you have to accept it.

ACCEPT IT. ehh wala namang magbabago kung magpapakalugmok ka sa pagkadurog nang puso mo.. kahit papaano ka pa nasaktan.. "third party" "walang spark" "hindi ka na mahal" "need space" "you deserve better" "i need to find my self" haha kahit ano pa yan.. you have to accept it.. that's your reality right now.. and nothing can ever change that.. kahit lumuhod ka or what ever.. hahaha.. it is what it is!

3. Get a grip - getting your heart broken doesn't mean your life has no sense or direction at all. Get a grip and pull yourself together. Save enough respect and love for yourself.

GET A GRIP. ang mahirap kasi pag nabbroken heart.. feeling mo wala nang saysay ang buhay mo.. wala ng direksyon.. get a grip man! pull your self together.. dapat nagtitira ng para sa sarili.. para hindi wasak na wasak.. hahaha ayos ba?

4. Life goes on - "it doesn't matter if you have to crawl or walk. Whatever it takes, we just have to keep moving." The world is not going to wait for you, so it's better if you'd keep your head up high and move forward than to stay sad and lonely just because you get your heart broken.

LIFE GOES ON KAYA MOVE ON. sabi nga.. "it doesn't matter if you have to crawl, or walk. what ever it takes.. just keep on moving" hehe.. kung feeling mo eh after ng breakup ehh huminto na ang pagikot ng mundo.. tama ka.. FEELING MO LAMANG UN! hahaha.. hindi titigil ang mundo para sa iyo.. kaya mapagiiwanan ka kung tutulala ka nalamang kasi "NASAKTAN" ka.. hehe.. sorry.. pero.. ganun talaga e..

5. Forgive not only the ones who have hurted you but also yourself. Its never wrong to love, maybe its just the wrong person or wrong time.

FORGIVE.. hindi lamang ung kabilang party.. kundi pati ang sarili mo.. kasi magiisip ka nyan.. "bakit ko pa sya minahal?" mga ganun.. hindi cool yun.. hehe... minahal mo sya e.. walang mali dun.. wrong person at the wrong time siguro.. pero kahit kailan.. hindi mali ang magmahal.. hehehe ayos ba?

6. Improve yourself - your character, attitude, perspective, etc. There are a lot of ways to improve ourselves, reserve some time in making yourself better. Remember that to change and to improve are two different things, don't confuse the two.

IMPROVE YOURSELF. character, attitude, perspective. ayan.. jan kasi tayo madalas nagkakaroon ng clashes.. and take note.. IMPROVE, hindi CHANGE.. hahaha magkaiba yon ganern! anyways.. madaming ways to improve our self.. pagyamanin ang sarili.. wala namang mawawala kung bibigyan natin ng oras ang pagpapalago ng ating mga buhay.. hahaha..

7. Be productive - don't let your pain hinder the beautiful things in front of you. Spend time with your friends and/or family, get a new hobby, get yourself busy.

lastly.. do something PRODUCTIVE... kasi usually.. pag heartbroken.. kain kain tulog tulog iyak iyak.. hahaha.. ang dapat.. magenjoy.. kontakin ang mga barkada.. lumabas labas ng lungga ganern!

I know it's not easy to follow these advices but I've tried it and fortunately it worked for me.

alam ko madaling sabihin.. mahirap gawin.. pero.. i know and i've been there.. and i've tried it.. proven na yan haha kaya wag kayong ano.. HAHAHA

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This article is brought to you by our guest blogger,

N.Y Abad

Do you have any other tips on how to deal with heartbreak? Share it with us! Perhaps, be my guest blogger! Click here for details.

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Realizations After Reading The Story Of The Giving Tree

Family 10:26 AM

Photo courtesy of Google; edited by yours truly.

Once upon a time, there lived a big tree. A little boy loved to come and play around it everyday. He climbed to the tree top, ate the fruits, took a nap under the shadow… He loved the tree and the tree loved to play with him. Time went by, the little boy grew, and he no longer played around the tree.

One day, the boy came back to the tree with a sad look on his face. “Come and play with me,” the tree asked the boy. “I am no longer a kid, I don’t play around trees anymore.” The boy replied, “I want toys. I need money to buy them.” “Sorry, I don’t have money… but you can pick all my fruits and sell them so you will have money.” The boy was so excited. He picked all the fruits on the tree and left happily. The boy didn’t come back. The tree was sad.

One day, the boy grown into a man returned. The tree was so excited. “Come and play with me,” the tree said. “I don’t have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?” “Sorry, I don’t have a house, but you can chop off my branches to build your house.” So the man cut all the branches off the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the boy didn’t come back afterward. The tree was again lonely and sad.

One hot summer day, the man returned and the tree was delighted. “Come and play with me!” The tree said. “I am sad and getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?” “Use my trunk to build your boat. You can sail far away and be happy.” So the man cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and didn’t come back for a long time.

Finally, the man returned after he had been gone for so many years. “Sorry, my boy, but I don’t have anything for you anymore. No more fruits to give you.” the tree said. “I don’t have teeth to bite,” the man replied. “No more trunk for you to climb on.” “I am too old for that now,” the man said.

“I really can’t give you anything, the only thing left is my dying roots,” the tree said with sadness. “I don’t need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years,” the man replied. “Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest. Come sit down with me and rest.” The boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled.

Moral: The tree in the story represents our parents. When we are young, we love to play with them. When we grow up, we leave them and only come back when we need help. Parents sacrifice their lives for us. Never forget their sacrifices. Give them love and care before its too late.

We don't often realize the disappointments we give them. We go on the opposite direction and leave them behind with uncertainty. We make decisions even if we know that what we are going to do or what we're doing will hurt them badly. Sometimes, we are selfish just to satisfy our own plans. But at the end of the day, when the problem or bad situation comes up, we go back to them hurriedly.

Family are the ones we can lean on in any circumstances. Let's not take advantage of it. I've also realized that parents really know what's best for us. If only I could turn back time, I would follow all of their advices — from “study hard”, I only studied hard when I was in 5th grade and 4th year high school. Blessed enough to land 2nd honors and that's one of my biggest achievement that I dedicated to them. Next one is “be diligent”, “be mindful”, “be sensitive” etc. We're humans, we are and will always be flawed but that's not an excuse to make unwise choices and decisions. That's the reason why we have our parents / guardians, to guide us along the way. By considering their feelings, we would definitely make more wise and healthy decisions for our lives.

No parent would advice their children to be on the wrong path, to be vengeful when in pain, to be insecure about other people's achievements, to be always dependent, to be hateful when things go wrong, etc. Rather, parents would advice us to be wise in making decisions, to be happy for other people's achievements, to learn to be independent, to be forgiving, to know our standards, to respect ourselves and others, and the list goes on. Let's always trust our parents especially in crucial moments. They've given us many things and sacrificed their lives, let's put some effort to make them proud and not to make them dismayed.

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Remember to Dream, Sparkle, and Shine!

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Motherhood At Its Finest

Family 9:05 AM

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6 Ways To Handle Your Heartbreak

Guest Blogger 9:17 PM

I am now making a new blog post which is a survey-like post wherein I will ask individuals on what's their advice for the people who are suffering from heartbreak or depression. Below is an answer that I got from a friend. (I will upload the rest of the list of short advices in a different post soon.)

Photo courtesy of Google; edited by yours truly.

Advice? It really doesn’t matter. What matters is that how you would handle the situation alone. Advices don’t matter if you don’t take it by the heart because in the end, it’s always up to you. But, if you really want to hear it from me, here are some of the things that I could say about heart breaks and coping up.

I’ve been in a long running relationship before and when I say long running, it’s an 11 year relationship. Relationship that is going for the better, that’s what I thought. To cut to the chase, it ended pretty bad. He cheated again, the girl throwing punches at me and me just standing there thinking, what the hell is happening. See? How can I cope up with that? How would you handle that situation?

We have different perspective on how to handle these kinds of situation. What is right for me would be wrong for you and vice versa. But, in the end, we all wanted to love and be loved in return. Life, love, feelings and emotions, they don’t play fair. That is the game we all play. We gamble with life and love. We invest feelings and emotions and in the end, one of you will hurt so much that they feel like the world is crumbling. You are melting away.

Here’s my own perspective, my own way of coping up and I do hope it could help you, yes you! The one who is reading.

1. Cry

Yes! Let it all out. It hurts, it really hurts. Don’t bottle it inside of you. You’ll lose your brain from overthinking. Crying is a natural body reaction. You cry because you are hurt. After that, you feel lighter. The pain is still there but you feel better than before. I know it will not take the pain away but atleast you were able to make your excess baggage a little bit lighter by letting it all out.

2. Pamper and love yourself (Justin Bieber?)

After giving so much of my time on him. Investing everything on our relationship, I completely lost myself in the process. I was not able to give time for myself, my family and even my friends. I was so consumed with spending time with him that everything I do should include him. Now that he’s gone and I have these overflowing love and time, I’m trying to focus those on myself.

Do the things you were not able to do during your time with him or get back to some of the activities you wanted to try but never did. This is the time to challenge yourself. You can travel by yourself (that’s what I’m about to do) meet new friends while on the road because they share the best stories you will hear. Try a new sport. Exercise (balik alindog project in your face!) Read a book. Find your own “thinking place” Just try!

Try everything you wanted to do just as long as you are not hurting yourself or others in the process. Motivate yourself. You can do it! Trying new things on your own gives you the gratification of excess happiness and memories. This also helps you realize you can do things without him and it feels really good!

3. Surround yourself with people that cares and loves you

Family and friends. They are a great support group. Nothing beats their presence during your lowest of lows. I was hesitating to tell my parents we broke up because I was hoping we could get back. But when I had the courage to tell them, I told them everything. 11 years was not easy. It was scary but at the same time it felt good.

They will tell you the truth and when I say the “truth”, it’s the harsh reality that you need to know. They will be the ones that will not let you send or make drunk calls and texts to your ex. They are the ones who are telling you the things that they see from the bigger picture because as I mentioned, it’s all about perspective. It’s a different perspective between you too and their own perspective. They will be the ones who would go through hell with you and try to understand your drama moments and still stick up for you even if you are an annoying bitch.

In my case, they still put up with my crazy high energy levels to my lowest of low zoning out kind of thing. Love your family. Love your friends! Invest your overflowing love and happiness with them. Not because you don’t know what to do with it because you previously spend everything of those with your ex, it’s because there are still people out there who loves you unconditionally and they deserve your love and attention.

4. Step out of your comfort zone

You were so used to your routine with him that when you guys broke up, you stayed that way. Well my mate, it’s your time to clean the slate. Re-evaluate your life choices and build your own dreams for yourself. I’m in the process of re-evaluating the things I really want to do for my future. I’m in a dead beat job right now. Lost in my own thoughts. Frequent panic attacks and now, I’m trying to stand firm on my plans. Hoping the universe will conspire with life to grant my plans. I’m about to leave my current job, travel and soul search and in that way I might clearly plan for my future.

Say yes to every opportunity that comes your way. Taking chances are better than “what ifs” and “should’ves”. Step out of your comfort zone. There’s so much more out of it. Just like what our dear friend Thomas Edison said, If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves. He’s right you know because, if you always do what you always did or what you are comfortable of, you’ll always get what you always got. Go out and see the world.

5. Rebounds? A no-no or hell yes?

I’m still on the process of understanding this part. Everything is new to me. I feel like a noob on this part. It’s all about perspective. Just remember nothing good comes out if you are rushing onto things. But if you want to, just keep in mind don’t get yourself burned by playing with fire. I mean it. It’s a big no-no for me now that I have realized. It’s one of the cheap thrills of life.

Why do people go after this? It’s an attempt to avoid the pain of the breakup. It’s an attempt to feel the same way you were feeling while you were in a relationship with your ex. No matter what happens, you are still hurting and you are also hurting the rebound guy/girl in the process. That’s sick. Don’t be a sadist and masochist. The right person for you will come, so don’t rush!

6. Appreciate the little things and be kind

You won’t believe this but, you can find true happiness with the little things in life. Small kind gestures from people are enough to make your day right. Happiness is the key. There’s no happiness without kindness. To me, kindness is empathy mixed with love. You must love yourself and love life even the little things that it can offer.

To be nice, generous, understanding and patient, all those qualities require kindness. We shouldn’t underestimate the power of kind words and gestures. Be thankful and be happy! These are some of the things that I’m currently doing right now while on the process of moving forward. It really helps me a lot. Confusing at times but these are the things that keep me going.

Life and love was never fair. They will always give you lemons and it is still your choice if you are going to make a lemonade or a lemon meringue pie out of it and if you do, take a big freaking bite out of it and throw your fist up in the air like Bender from The Breakfast Club and say I CAN! Never give up on life. Never give up on yourself!

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This article is brought to you by our guest blogger,

Monica Lacuesta.

Do you have any other tips on how to deal with heartbreak? Share it with us! Perhaps, be my guest blogger! Click here for details.

************************

Remember to Dream, Sparkle, and Shine!

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15 Words of Wisdom Every Parent Must Give Their Children

Family 12:16 PM

There are many ways to say “I love you” to your children, without actually uttering those three small-but-mighty words. Below are the 15 words of wisdom that parents should give their children. After all, let’s face it. No matter how hard we all try to travel a bump-free path to happiness, life will always present its share of surprise potholes.

Photo courtesy of BuzzFeed; edited by yours truly.

1. Communication and respect are the foundations for a lasting relationship.

2. Never compare yourself to others. It's a waste of energy. You are unique and have your own gifts to offer the world.

3. Look after your health — physical, mental, and spiritual.

4. Set boundaries — work, family, and friendships.

5. Expect to fail. Failure is not fatal. Learn the lessons, then get back up and try again.

6. Act with integrity at all times.

7. Know your values.

8. "No" is a complete sentence.

9. You are never alone.

10. Forgive yourself first and then others. We are all in this together.

11. Your attitude is always a choice.

12. Happiness starts within. Do not expect anyone else to make you happy.

13. Change happens. It's one of the great certainties in life. Learn to roll with it.

14. Never give up! Unless of course you’re doing something which might be wrong — then you need to stop.

15. Little stuff matters — manners get you a long way.

Say these phrases in the appropriate situation, and even more importantly, try to prove the truth of them in your actions. If you can manage this, then chances are your kids will be just fine.

It’s incredibly important to raise your child in an atmosphere of love and affection, and to make sure they feel safe. This will have a positive effect on their self-esteem and help them to become strong and self-reliant.

I'm sure you will feel calm knowing that your child has the quality of being worthy of honor or respect.

Remember to Dream, Sparkle, and Shine!

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Ways To Handle Your Heartbreak Vol. 2

Realizations After Reading The Story Of The Giving Tree

Motherhood At Its Finest

6 Ways To Handle Your Heartbreak

15 Words of Wisdom Every Parent Must Give Their Children

CAMAYAN BEACH RESORT

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