Lessons Learned From Fifty Shades Of Grey

3:43 PM

Let me first give those of you who are not familiar with the story a very brief synopsis of 50 Shades of Grey.

Christian Grey is a self-made, gorgeous, hot, handsome, 27-year-old billionaire (think Mark Zuckerberg but with unbelievable good looks.) He is psychologically and emotionally closed off to people because he had a very rough childhood. Anastasia Steele is a virgin, college student who becomes sexually and romantically involved with him. And oh yeah, and there’s one more small little detail... he has a slight preference for S&M activities.

Not only does Anastasia manage to soften his heart, but they apparently fall “madly in love” with each other. I think you have the main idea.

Below are some lessons learned from 50 Shades of Grey:

Photo from Google, edited by yours truly.
1. Is this what most people think REAL LOVE is?

Christian Grey is highly controlling. He is highly possessive of Ana. He is jealous. He has a temper. He is moody. He is unpredictable. Is this what most people (or women) think is true love — and/or the perfect man? Does love equal control, jealousy and possessiveness? To me, real love is kind. It is freeing. It is gentle. It is pretty much the opposite of what Christian Grey does. Emotions like needing to control, possessiveness and jealousy are all rooted in fear — NOT love. If you are jealous or possessive, you fear you will lose that person. But our culture teaches us that these emotions equal love. And this book/movie totally affirms it.
2. Some stereotypes hold true.

We all say stereotypes are bad. And some are, but some aren’t. But here are some stereotypes that do hold up in the movie: (1) women like strong, powerful, rich men; (2) women like to be taken care of; (3) women want to be adored by their man — basically for him to be obsessed with her.

3. Some stereotypes do NOT hold true.

Stereotypically, women “don’t like sex.” Or if they do, then they shouldn’t admit it. And they certainly shouldn’t pursue a lot of sex because then that makes them sluts.

4. Couples really need to put a lot more effort into working on their relationships and their sex lives.

I think it’s sad that most women would like to replace their real world with a fantasy world (not that we all don’t like a little escapism from time to time.) Putting a little more effort into their romantic life (in all aspects), would be beneficial. And that goes for both partners — they have to put in equal effort. 
5. Your dream can come true by simply doing what you love.

This insight has nothing to do with men, women, sex, relationships or anything like that. This refers to the author herself, E.L. James. Apparently, E.L. James started writing Fifty Shades as online Twilight fan fiction. I think she was simply having fun in the beginning, and somehow it turned into this worldwide phenomenon. Whoa. Who wouldn’t like THAT to happen to them, right? So what does that say to me? You can follow your passions and it can eventually turn into your career. Unfortunately, I don’t think most people believe that.

6. Be submissive but not to the point that you'll forget your identity, opinions, personality, or individuality. (added)

Good relationships are when both people decide and both know when to step back. It's all about trying to make this work.  

So yeah, laters baby! ;)

Remember to Dream, Sparkle, and Shine!
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